Comparison: The Thief Of Joy


It's something I've done since lord knows when, whether it be me comparing my grades with my friends, my summer holiday spent at home to my friends going on holiday every other second, my figure and my skin compared to people my age, my blog and its success to other blogs, it's something that we all hate to do but can't seem to stop doing anyway.

comparison is a thief of joy and its time we focused on ourselves a little bit more.

I thought I'd write a post about comparison because its something I know we all struggle with, not being content with our own lives, with what we have, with the way we spend our days. But its time that we focus on improving and appreciating where we are in life, what we've achieved and how we can do better ourselves.

Comparison is a thief of self love:
The earliest stage where I remember comparing my looks to someone else was back in primary school, year six when I was dumped not once but twice by my so called 'boyfriends' at the time for other girls, they didn't seem heartbroken in the slightest, they had new girls seconds later, literally seconds later. Was it because I still watched disney channel? Was it because of my high school musical bookbag? Possibly. 

But over time I started to compare myself more and more to other girls, I'd ask why I look a certain why, why I weighed a certain amount, why my skin wasn't picture perfect like theirs? By praising their looks and wanting to look like others I was chipping away at my confidence, my love for myself, appreciation for my own beauty, inside and out.

Its so easy to reassure someone else you love how beautiful they are when they don't see it on their own but how come it's so hard to tell ourselves the same thing? In fact it almost seems easier to insult our own looks than compliment them? 

time to change that. 

Lets start giving ourselves the compliments we deserve, I've started by focusing on one feature I love the most by myself and reminding myself that the journey to loving yourself isn't a quick or easy one but one day I will fall in love with myself.

Comparison is a thief of success:
During my blogging experience I've found it very easy to fall into situations where I'm comparing my blog to others. My theme, pictures, content, followers, collaborations, you name it. Little did I realise I was sucking the joy out of blogging for myself by not being proud of everything I had achieved. In my eyes what I had achieved wasn't worth celebrating because I wasn't getting the same opportunities as others, no one was commenting on my post, companies didn't want to collaborate with me. Having a sister that's doing amazing with her blog made me want to be like her but how could I when she's been blogging for 7 years and I just over a year?

You can't build an empire in a day, things take time. Work on perfecting your craft and finding your niche. Number don't define success, collaborations don't define success. What makes you successful is writing and producing content that makes you proud.

It's the same with my photography, I own a pentax, not a canon, not a nikon nor an olympus pen but does that mean I'm not a official blogger or official photographer when it comes to me doing shoots with people? No it's all about doing the most with that you can, you can have the worlds best camera but if you don't have an eye for lighting, position, angles then what is the point? The camera isn't everything, that's something I've learnt. For a long time I didn't think I was skilled or qualified to be offering shoots since my stuff isn't the latest or high tech but I'm doing just fine and I'm proud of what I produce, so that's all that matters.

you define your own success.

Comparison is a thief of progress:
I often find myself comparing myself where I'm at, what I've done to my friends and people around me when they're doing amazing things and achieving some of their dreams and goals. "Why can't I be like them?", "What am I doing wrong?" I ask myself as I lay in bed and do nothing about it. I could be doing the same thing and building my own foundation for myself but its easier to believe our dreams are impossible than even trying to make them a reality sometimes.

Well...stop doing that.

If there is something you want, dream, crave go out there and try making it happen. It may be hard but if you try and don't succeed then what have you lost? You can say you tried right? I've been taking Sade's blog pictures for her for 4 years and it wasn't till this summer that I decided to start taking pictures for other bloggers. I didn't have much faith in my skills but I did know how much I loved being behind the lens and editing the pictures after.

But I've been more successful than I ever imagined and still can't believe it. Now I've built the foundations to doing something as I love in the future, if once I've finished getting my degree I could go into photography full time then that would be the dream and that's the dream I'm working towards so stick around maybe and join me on this journey.

you never know until you try.

i hope you were able to connect with some of these points, what's one way you find yourself comparing constantly?

dress - boohoo
bag - missguided
slippers - primark
until the next post,
with love yossy x

What's your opinion?

  1. Absolutely loved reading this post and it's so so true. Comparison takes so much away from us and that too more than just our time. We pour our energy into something that pulls us down when we could use that same outlook, adjust it and use it as motivation when moving forward xo

  2. This post was so beautifully written. Lately i've been doing a lot of comparison in many different aspects - in blogging, in my personal life, in work..etc. It truly has left me feeling cruddy. You're so right - it's best to focus on yourself and learn to love yourself.
    Holly x || |

  3. I couldn't agree more with you. There is really nothing good in constant comparison. I think that we should strive to be better than we were yesterday and not better from somebody else. x

    Antonia || Sweet Passions

  4. I can 100% relate to this post and I agree that comparison is a thief of self-love, progress, success and happiness. We all need to stop being so hard on ourselves and realise that we are doing just fine and everyone has their own timing and own beauty.

    Lots of love,
    Agnese |

  5. This was a much-needed read for me. Sometimes it's best to just focus on your own thing and be proud of what you can actually do and create! Also treating ourselves the way we treat others is something that needs to happen more often - I definitely need to stop being so hard on myself sometimes.

    Belle in Black and White

  6. Comparison is so annoying. I do it subconsciously sometimes and it stops me from making the most of who I am.


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